the girl next door.

Changes

Haven’t written on here in quite awhile. And truthfully, I probably would have handled my stress better if I did. This past month has been un-real to me. Howie and I are buying our first house. Its not exactly all happening in the order I always thought I would do things, but everything feels very right and meant to be. I couldn’t believe how soon this all started happening after we started looking… it’s wild.

Day 1: I get notice on my door saying my rent is about to be increased significantly to the point it’s stupid I’m not just paying a mortgage.

Day 2: We go to the VA realty place to learn about VA loans since Howie is still active duty for another year. And the realtor takes to look at a ton of houses online that day! We fell in love with the last house we visited.

Day 3: We find out there are competing offers on the house, so we put an offer in. Within 30 minutes offer is accepted.

Did the home inspection that next week, the VA appraisal was a bit drawn-out so there was some waiting there (but I’m not suprised), the house under appraised by 10K, so we had to slightly re-negotiate, but its saving us money, so it ended up being fine. Then our loan got approved last week. And settlement is next Friday, holy-crap-wow. And then they’re sending Howie for another 2 weeks in PA. :( It sucks, but we can use the extra money right now. It will definitely help us out.

Of course with me, my biggest fear is him still up and leaving me. Even though I know he’s not that kind of person, my ex scarred me in the sense of just how easy it is for someone you trust to up and go and do things behind your back. So that’s something I personally just need to get over. But I will with time. Honestly, his actions will probably stick with me for a very long time.. I just try to forget about it and him.

I just still can’t believe we’re really doing this. Howie means so much to me, and as scary as this is, he does makes me feel confident that everything will always be okay as long as we have each other, and that he’s taking just as big of a risk with this if not more than I am, so why would he just up and go? So glad he’s the person I’m sharing this experience with. Couldn’t think of anyone better!

This is going to be a BIG week for us. This is one of the biggest things I’ve ever done in my entire life. It’s not just some apartment. It’s not a townhouse. It’s a legit single family house that will be all ours to take care of. This is huge. And I’m starting to get really really excited, buying paint today started to make it feel a little more real. :)

We’re all looking for a fairytale ending.

Girl meets perfect guy, lives happily ever after. And sometimes even when you think you’ve found your happily ever after, plans can change in a split second when your knight in shining armor decides you are no longer the girl deserving of all his affection. And sometimes, his loss turns into the best thing that’s ever happened to you. At the time, it hurt, more than anything has ever hurt you, and some memories will always sting. But what feels better than anything is knowing you’ve been broken, put yourself back together, and someone has came along and carved out the fairy tale ending you were always longing for. Some days may be harder than others. Real relationships take effort, loyalty and dedication. But I want to give you that much, all of me, forever and always, because you saved me from thinking all guys out there are the same and that I never deserved a prince charming to begin with.